Introduction

To preface, I remember building this blog from scratch to be able to write more yet it is extremely hilarious how life turns out cause it was always "Oh, I'll just post next week" yet next week does not arrive. While writing this I am currently listening to "I'll Try Anything Once" by The Strokes where I have listened way too much to recently and if you follow me on my Instagram where I post them way too much. Anyways I brought up this song as this past year I have done this every single day, meaning I will try anything once for the sake of just doing it without any end goal.

My mind is awkward as I never see the end goal of "I will weigh 180 pounds" or "I will be independent" or anything else most people from the outside look inwards, meanwhile I am having mini panic attacks about if I am doing "enough" or doing "too little". Well a wakeup call was awaiting me just that, and it did happen a few months after receiving my first job as a software developer.

Before getting onto the next section, if you do not want to read me ramble about my one year journey so far since juggling various aspects of my life then go ahead and read this article where I talk about prefix sum! If you wish to continue, then go ahead but the following will be non-technical.

Health

Long story short, I was overweight... heck even to present day I am but every week it is slowly getting better as I have been consistent with the gym and agressive with my diet (shout out Macrofactor). Visiting the doctor's office was where I was told that if my weight kept spiraling upwards was there was some factors where I can lead to some health implications so with most things I do day in day out I got to work, slowly yet surely I kept consuming knowledge and (no pun intended) stopped consuming.

Since January 2025 I have lost over 23 pounds and still counting, now I am not saying this was an easy feat or was it just cutting out all bad foods (exception peanut butter, missing you so much PB) but making food lifestyle choices has been the real change for me while still enjoying all previous foods I still crave but just in less portions. Learning to meal prep has been extremely rewarding and almost a ritual for me now every week, but even some weeks I did not meal prep but I did my best to just follow my deficit the best to my ability because again I am only human. Also not saying "look at me, look at me I did it" cause it is hard yet I took it just one day at a time as my previous life "challenges" I have went through where I just tried it once, from there that is when change started appearing day in and day out for me.

I am writing this section specifically cause I converse with various people about "wow, I couldn't do what you do" or "man, what are you doing that is different" or "wow, your consistency is amazing" where I am slowly starting to appreciate the comments because to me it isn't something I personally should be proud of even though I do appreciate the kind remarks (more on this later). There are also some things that are also hard to write out here, where I believe some bad remarks were said to me yet I do ignore those remarks as I don't believe they truly reflect what my worth as a person.

Anyways, I digress but I believe most just need to just try that one thing once. I know easier said than done... some days you feel tired getting home from work or you had a terrible day where scarfing down those peanut butter ice cream sounds the best thing I can do right now. Set up a system, try to follow that system where if you do derail from that system then it is okay cause remember you are human. There are days where skipping a workout or eating that hamburger with french fies and that delicious peanut butter milkshake is okay, as long as the days you were consistent outweigh the days you were not consistent and you keep caring about your goals.

Showing up for five day workouts when I am on my graduate school break is tough, even more so while going to the gym while juggling my software day job and grad school was tougher so going three to four days while still maintaining my diet was still feasible and I was still losing weight. Any form of consistency is better than zero consistency, you sometimes just gotta start and keep caring and keep going.

Consistency in health is key to be able to get to your goals but remind yourself there are some days where you do not want to, as long as you get back to the path you see yourself going to. Being kind to yourself is the best thing you can do for yourself, forgiving yourself, and being proud of yourself is key to being your best version of yourself.

This is just not a mindset I have learned from health, it is just one aspect where I have learned to apply it in I believe more important aspects of my life where I have grown as an individual.

Independence

Moving out has been tough, although I am blessed to be close with family it is a different playing field than living with family. I can literally wake up to eat a big bowl of ice cream for breakfast, call off of work, play Mario Kart World on my silly Switch 2, and laze around all day yet there is this constant cycle of me just doing my own thing to be able to work on my goals yet it is tough.

There are days where the latter sounds like "the life" yet when I do catch myself finding the free time to do whatever I want to do, I don't. Most of it comes from this internal guilt where I am catching myself and thinking "is this where I want to be?" or "maybe what I am doing is wrong, it will keep me behind". Don't get me wrong, I love working towards my goals to be able to hopefully break into big tech or be able to build an app I am truly passionate about or just anything else really. Although I am human, humans need breaks once in a while.

Breaking down or going down spirals because of "wasting time" or "I am not doing enough", was a constant reminder of me feeling behind in life. I kept hearing from family or friends saying I am doing well, to stop and smell the roses yet and yet I couldn't find myself to feel grateful... even worse I did not feel proud of my accomplishments. I know this is extremely provocative and maybe a bit privileged but my head was constantly like this for quite a good while, it was not until I personally sought therapy is where I started to listen to myself more.

Therapy is kind of a silly idea and even a bit sillier when I first started to get into it, without disclosing much I believe it is only one aspect of the healing process but it ultimately still falls on the individual to take those lessons and apply them in their day to day. Being able to apply or not apply based on what you believe is what has helped me personally succeed in trying to find a balance, now I do not see all these goals that I have to checklist one by one but rather a lifestyle change to be able to just do one percent better every day.

I started to give myself more grace, worked towards being happy and content with what I have and the independence I have now and am truly blessed of it. Living alone can get lonely but over this year, I have learned to be happier by myself and learned to also find balance in life cause damn I was pushing myself to the point where I could have burned out... My health was the biggest wakeup call not only physically but also mentally, thanfully the gym plus other hobbies and other forms of leisure has helped me to quiet down those feelings of self-despair.

Final Thoughts

Getting back to topic and to conclude this blog, yes it is okay to work towards your goals and heck if you do not know what those goals may be- just try anything once. As long as you are able to work towards even one thing, even if you do not know what that thing may be, just go ahead and just a tiny bit every single day consistently. A lot of social media will say "hustle hustle", heck even my posts scream that so I do apologize if it does come off as that way, but also trying to strike a balance is key to be able to get yourself on the right track of your goals no matter what that may be.

My goals can change over time, your goals can change too and that is okay! Coming from someone who is trying to juggle graduate school, full time job, health, gym, etc. you do not have to be a master of all- just master the things that are extremely important to you and the things that are important to you are just as fine. This may be a bit extreme but your goals can be big initially but also working towards smaller goals is just as fine, as long as you keep re-evaluating them on your journey cause I personally believe that is where burn out can lead to.

Anyways, I hope you liked this personal blog. Just know you are not alone, I believe we are all just trying to do our own thing and please be kind to those around you! Comment down below if you are feeling lost or just wanna share your thoughts! Thanks! Until the next one, Jay.